Teacher: Shakespeare wrote two kinds of plays: comedies, which always have at least one wedding, and tragedies, which always have at least one death.
Teen: What about Henry V?
Teacher: Shakespeare wrote three kinds of plays: comedies, which always have at least one wedding, and tragedies, which always have at least one death, and histories, which are historical.
Teen: Does anything travel at the speed of darkness?
Teen: Who drank all the coffee? Mom! Can you make more coffee?
Elective: Halloween Costume Design
Teen: During lunch, can you sew my cape?
Teacher: You want me to work on my lunch break?
Teen: Can I sew my cape?
Teacher: Uh, no.
(I definitely see some potential here for him learning to sew on my machine, but I'm expecting more fabric today for two other costumes, and I just can't afford the learning curve this time. Maybe I'll have him, after Halloween, make a cape for Billy and learn that way.)