Danielle Bean is hosting a discussion about this article at CNN which describes reactions to the magazine cover shown to the left. I wouldn't consider myself a "lactivist" mainly because I hate to be identified with a single cause. I'm so much more than just a breastfeeding mother.
But I am a breastfeeding mother, and so was the Virgin Mother. And so I guess I just need to be a lactivist. At least for a day.
I didn't really know where to start on this topic until I clicked on the link to the article. Although I had clicked on the link when it was brought to my attention by Danielle, I clicked on it again to show Bill when my friend Monica sent me the same link. The banner ad immediately beside the cover of the magazine was an ad for Victoria's Secret. No joke. Mere centimeters apart on my computer screen were two breasts: one feeding a baby and the other barely covered by a bra. One an image that evokes love; the other an image that evokes lust. And people are up in arms over the breastfeeding mother. Too funny.
Now, if you or someone you know is or was a bottlefeeder, please understand that I don't care. I want everybody to be happy and successful in the vocation of motherhood, and I know that there isn't one right way to do that. Maybe you had to bottlefeed, maybe you wanted to bottlefeed. Good for you. I returned to work after my first child, and I had to supplement with formula. It's not a crime. I don't feel I have to justify my actions to anybody, please don't feel you have to justify yours to me.
But if you take the position that bottlefeeding is better, or that breastfeeding is in some way gross or barbaric or animalistic...all I can say is: you're wrong. Perhaps others may agree with you, and I don't want to be confrontational or nasty. But sometimes, believe it or not, there is a right and a wrong, and that attitude is wrong. Plain and simple. So sorry.
I fully support a woman having the right to breastfeed anywhere that a woman may bottlefeed. At the park. At the mall. In the grocery store checkout lane. On an airplane. Life goes on. To tell a woman that she must breastfeed in private is to ostracize a woman, to put her on house arrest for the crime of doing the best thing for her child. That is ridiculous.
I fully support the call for modest breastfeeding. I sympathize with those who are concerned about an accidental flash of skin in the face of a teenaged boy or unsuspecting man. My father was very uncomfortable with the idea of me nursing the babies in front of him...until he saw a newspaper article with a photo showing a woman modestly doing it. He then realized that breastfeeding really could be done modestly. Yes, everyone has a horror story about a true "lactivist," one who brazenly hangs it all out there for everyone to see or one who allows her 3 year old to lift up her shirt for a self-serve snack. But for every breastfeeder like this there are hundreds who nurse so discreetly that people ask to see the baby without realizing that the baby is nursing.
We can't ban public breastfeeding because of a few exhibitionists. Even if it makes you uncomfortable. I don't like to hear profanity, especially not around my children, but it's out there. I handle those situations as they arise. If someone is immodestly breastfeeding her child, you just need to deal with it, one way or another. But the solution is not to criminalize all breastfeeding.
And finally, I need to address the topic of the photograph as art and those who feel that either it isn't or that nudity in art is not for children. I do think that this photo falls under the category of art, and I think it is beautiful art as well. It is not how I would choose to breastfeed, even in my own home, even if alone, but as an expression of maternal love, this photo is excellent. One of Danielle's readers felt that nude artwork did not belong in a home with children and seemed to imply that children should be sheltered from such images, even in a museum setting. I disagree. I won't go so far as to say that this person is wrong. I just disagree.
I happen to have a breastfeeding Madonna in my home, scandalous as that may be. My sister has some nude artwork in her home. I don't make her hide it when we visit. I actually want my children to appreciate the beauty of the human body. God made it; He called it good. I do think that there is a greater danger in photography being less art and more pornography (not that a painting can't be pornographic), but the big question is: what is the intent? If the intent is to portray the person as sexually desirable, then it is pornographic. If the intent is portray humanity or to show the beauty of the human form then it is art. And I feel that children should be exposed to good art, even if the subjects are unclothed.And if the subject is a breastfeeding mother, well, it's nothing they haven't already seen.















